the last few days have just been so rough. I have been so angry and I am having a hard time figuring out why! I can see the things that seem to "set" me off but, they don't all make sense to me. I was so stressed out yesterday, I woke up between 3 and 4, took some tylenol, and then ended up having a seizure. I spent the rest of the day in bed with a terrible headache. Rob kept me up all night and man, was I irritated!
This morning, I got up, having only grabbed an hour or two at the most, and I was in a terrible mood. I am normally not a moody person! I just couldn't keep my emotions in check at all! If I wasn't crying, I was spittin' fire! For some reason, Rob's constant surfing of other church internet sites has just been bothering me. Our church is small, we don't get paid and seeing these big name pastors and all their "success" just feels like lemon juice in my very open wound right now. Another irritant is all the time Rob spends working on church stuff. I feel like I work hard to keep him healthy and to make sure he has everything he needs and wants and everyone else gets the few hours of "good health" he has to give. It sucks and I hate it. It is making me cranky. The lack of help around the house from the kids is making me angry too. Of course, today the girls were a huge help. I think they noticed the stress level was WAY UP! I try so hard to be organized but, no matter what I try, I just make a lousy wife, mother, and housekeeper.
I am just hating my life right now and I don't know how to fix things. Maybe tomorrow will be better but, I am not holding out much hope...
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